GO BEYOND THE RIVALRY

"Well, it was kind of funny because the first time I met you, you hated me."

Jake Brendel's words hang in the air. Colton McKivitz doesn't even hesitate: "I sure did."

This is the foundation of one of the most genuine friendships in the San Francisco 49ers locker room. Not a polished PR narrative about instant chemistry or mutual respect—but a real story about two guys who started on opposite sides and came out the other side as brothers.

The Know-It-All Problem

So why didn't Colton like Jake? The answer is refreshingly honest.

"I didn't really understand how you worked, how you thought," Colton admits. "You were more analytical … You know that you're right mostly all the time. You know your stuff and that caught me off guard."

Translation: Jake was too damn smart, and Colton wasn't ready for it.

Jake's approach to the game is cerebral—quarterback-like in his command of the offensive line. He's the kind of player who knows the playbook inside and out, who's always three steps ahead mentally. For Colton, who was going through his own struggles at the time, Jake's confidence looked like arrogance.

"This guy knows everything. He thinks he knows everything," Colton thought.

The Turning Point

Then they got on the field together.

"And you get on the field and it's like, 'All right, he does [know everything], so you make the call and I'll listen then.'"

That moment—when ego gives way to respect—is where real teams are built. Jake proved himself not just through words but through performance. Once Colton got over his initial resistance, once he saw that Jake's analytical approach wasn't about showing off but about being excellent at his job, everything changed.

"Once we understood how each other worked, I think that's when we connected," Colton reflects. "I think we think alike. I'm not as educated, but definitely football-wise and personally we think alike a lot."

Watch the Full Interview

Finding Common Ground

What really bonded them? Shared adversity.

Both Jake and Colton have been cut. Both have experienced that gut-punch moment of being told they're not good enough. Both had to make the choice: quit or fight back.

"We kind of had our same punch-in-the-mouth moment in the league," Colton says.

That shared experience created understanding. Jake had been cut five times before finding stability with the 49ers. He knew what Colton was going through when Colton faced his own release—the anger, the self-doubt, the question of whether it's worth it to keep fighting.

"It was a long time coming before we became friends. I was going through some adversity, being cut and was quite angry at the world," Colton recalls. "I didn't talk to anyone for a month."

But Jake had been there. He understood. And that understanding created space for real friendship.

Why We Hate People Like Us

There's an old saying that we often don't like people who remind us of ourselves. In Jake and Colton's case, they were both stubborn, both driven, both refusing to accept anything less than success. That similarity created friction at first.

"We were just thought differently," Colton says. But eventually, they realized those differences were complementary, not conflicting.

Now? "Yeah, it's been kind of cool. Our relationship has bloomed, man. I think we play kind of the same level. At least effort-wise."

Then comes the brotherly jab: "You're just a little shorter arms, but..."

Jake fires back: "Wow."

This is what real friendship looks like—the ability to give each other grief while having complete trust on the field.

The Lesson

Not everyone you meet is going to be your instant best friend. Some of the most important relationships in your life might start with friction. The key is being willing to look past first impressions, to earn respect through action rather than words, and to find common ground even when it seems like you're on opposite sides.

Jake and Colton's friendship wasn’t instant. It unfolded naturally because they both showed up, did their jobs, and eventually recognized they were on the same team—literally and figuratively.

"Now we really like each other," Colton laughs.

Yeah. They do.

Coming Next in the GO BEYOND Series: How getting cut five times shaped Jake's career, and why Colton calls his release the wake-up call he needed.

WATCH: Jake & Colton get real about their first impressions of each other

Get the GO Sleeves Used by Jake Brendel & Colton McKivitz